Rowley Jefferson's Awesome Friendly Adventure Read online

  he FAILED. And now it was going to

  be winter FOREVER and his dad would

  REALLY be disappointed in him.

  172

  So Roland walked down to the riverbank

  and then pulled his flute out of his pocket

  and played a sad tune.

  All of a sudden Roland heard a splash

  and noticed a MERMAID sitting on a rock

  under the moonlight.

  The mermaid said she liked Roland’s song

  and that he must practice a LOT. And

  Roland asked her if she was the Little

  Mermaid and she said yeah but not the

  Disney one.

  173

  The Little Mermaid swam closer to

  Roland and they had a really nice chat.

  Roland told the Little Mermaid a knock-

  knock joke and she LAUGHED. And Roland

  could tell she wasn’t faking.

  Then they talked about all the famous

  women they both admired like Amelia

  Earhart and Jane Goodall and the one

  who researched radioactivity.

  But Roland said the woman he admired

  the MOST was his mom.

  174

  And then Roland got SAD because he

  realized he might never SEE her again.

  The Little Mermaid wanted to know what

  happened to his mom so he told her the

  whole story from the beginning. But he

  didn’t mind because the Little Mermaid

  was a good listener.

  When Roland was done the Little Mermaid

  told him that this river went straight to

  the Ice Fortress and if he followed it he’d

  get there in a few DAYS.

  But Roland told her a few days was

  too LONG because it was going to be a

  crescent moon the next night.

  175

  So then the Little Mermaid pulled out her

  OWN flute and played a happy tune. And

  Roland thought that was kind of a weird

  thing to do right at that moment but he

  liked the song so he didn’t say anything.

  A few seconds later a NARWHAL came to

  the surface.

  176

  The Little Mermaid told Roland the

  narwhal was her FRIEND and it could get

  him to the Ice Fortress before the crescent

  moon rose.

  Then Roland told her about his team and

  said he couldn’t go without THEM. So she

  played some MORE music and then MORE

  narwhals appeared. And before long

  Roland and his friends were on their way

  to the Ice Fortress.

  ef

  177

  I was really proud of this chapter because

  I liked how it teaches kids that if they

  listen to their parents and practice their

  instruments then good things will happen.

  Plus I really liked the part with the

  narwhals and I told Greg we could put

  one on the COVER.

  But Greg said it was a TERRIBLE chapter

  and I was gonna have to make a TON of

  changes.

  178

  Greg told me the narwhal stuff felt way

  too YOUNG and if we put one on the

  cover then only little kids would buy the

  book. And he said he didn't wanna have to

  babysit a bunch of preschoolers at our

  book signings.

  But I said I LIKED the narwhals. So Greg

  said maybe we could do an early-reader

  version of the book and a narwhal could

  be on the cover of THAT.

  Greg said I should swap out the narwhal

  for something COOLER like a seahorse

  because then OLDER kids would like it.

  179

  I said there aren't any seahorses in the

  story but Greg said that didn't MATTER

  because once someone buys the book

  you've got their money.

  Then Greg told me it's not even that

  IMPORTANT what happens in the book

  since the people in charge of making the

  movie are just gonna change everything

  ANYWAY.

  180

  Greg said they were gonna have to make

  the story a lot more EDGY so teenagers

  would wanna see it. Then he said they'd

  probably replace Roland with someone

  who was twice his age and would say a

  lot of swears.

  I said maybe we shouldn't even MAKE

  a movie if they're just gonna change

  everything.

  181

  And Greg said if there's not gonna be

  a movie then I could say good-bye to

  video games and personal fragrances and

  Halloween costumes and kids' meals at

  fast-food restaurants.

  I told Greg I was OK with that because I

  was only trying to have fun and use my

  imagination and now everything was just

  getting too COMPLICATED.

  So Greg said if we weren't gonna try to

  cash in on the book then he wasn't gonna

  help me FINISH it. And to be honest I was

  kind of OK with that too.

  CHAPTER 14

  The narwhals took Roland and his friends

  all the way to the frozen shores of the Ice

  Fortress.

  Roland’s team said thanks to the Little

  Mermaid and the narwhals for getting

  them this far. And when Roland said

  good-bye to the Little Mermaid he gave

  her hand an extra squeeze to let her

  know he thought she was SPECIAL.

  184

  The Ice Fortress was surrounded by a

  thick wall just like the One-Eyed Wizard

  SAID it would be. Roland and the team

  started looking for the secret door but

  without that map they didn’t even know

  where to START.

  Then the One-Eyed Wizard stopped in his

  tracks. He said his magic eyeball must’ve

  fallen out of the elf’s pocket because

  all of a sudden he could see EXACTLY

  where she was.

  185

  She was nearby looking for the secret

  DOOR.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said they needed to

  move QUICKLY and find the door before

  the ELF could. So the wizard and Roland

  hurried off ahead of the rest of the group.

  They ran along the ice wall and found

  the magic eyeball sitting on the frozen

  ground. But the elf was GONE.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said she had

  probably already found the secret door

  and they were too LATE. And that made

  Roland feel really sad. But he was pretty

  tired from all that running so he leaned

  against the ice wall to rest.

  Then the part of the wall where Roland

  put his hand started to GLOW and there

  was a loud rumbling noise.

  187

  It was the secret door! After it opened,

  Roland and the wizard stepped inside the

  tunnel.

  They felt their way through the tunnel

  until it started getting light up ahead.

  And when they got to the end Roland

  knew they were in the White Warlock’s

  THRONE ROOM.

  The White Warlock was sitting on his

  throne but Roland didn’t see his MOM.

  188

  Roland had been waiting for this moment

 
for a long time but now he was so scared

  he couldn’t even MOVE.

  The One-Eyed Wizard WASN’T scared

  though. He jumped out of the tunnel and

  stood in front of the White Warlock with

  his wand raised. But the White Warlock

  just LAUGHED.

  Roland thought that laugh was really

  FAMILIAR. And that’s when he realized

  the White Warlock was actually SANTA.

  189

  Roland was totally CONFUSED so he

  asked the One-Eyed Wizard what was

  going on. The One-Eyed Wizard explained

  EVERYTHING and it was kind of a long

  story.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said Santa was his

  BROTHER. And when they were little

  boys their parents let them each pick a

  HOLIDAY to represent.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said Santa was

  totally spoiled so he got to pick FIRST and

  of course he got the BEST holiday.

  190

  And when the One-Eyed Wizard picked

  HIS holiday he got one that nobody even

  CARES about.

  So Santa went on to become world-famous

  because his holiday was AWESOME but

  the One-Eyed Wizard couldn’t get people

  to care about his holiday even though he

  tried his hardest.

  191

  And then one day he got a little careless

  while waving a flag and he’s been plotting

  revenge on his brother ever SINCE.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said he knew he

  could never challenge Santa at the North

  Pole because his elves would PROTECT

  him. But he ALSO knew that Santa goes

  to the Ice Fortress to relax during the

  summer months so he hatched a plan to

  attack him THERE.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said the only

  PROBLEM was that the Ice Fortress was

  protected by a giant WALL and the only

  way in was through a secret entrance.

  192

  Roland told the One-Eyed Wizard he kind

  of already KNEW this part but what the

  wizard said NEXT was a real surprise.

  The One-Eyed Wizard said that only a

  person who was pure of heart could OPEN

  the secret door. And he’d spent YEARS

  searching for someone like that.

  Then one day the One-Eyed Wizard was

  looking through his crystal ball and he

  saw a boy who was good and kind and

  loved his parents very much. And that

  boy was ROLAND.

  193

  The One-Eyed Wizard knew that if he

  tricked Roland into thinking his mom got

  kidnapped he’d go on a journey to SAVE

  her. And that would lead him right to the

  Ice Fortress and the secret door.

  So the One-Eyed Wizard whipped up a

  snowstorm in Roland’s village and when

  his mom went to the store to buy a snow

  shovel he hypnotized their next-door

  neighbor Mrs. Nettles into telling Roland

  the made-up story about the White Warlock.

  And that’s how this whole thing got

  STARTED.

  194

  Then he said the story about marrying

  the White Warlock and the endless winter

  thing was all a big LIE.

  At first Roland was HAPPY because this

  meant his mom was safe and sound back

  at home. But then he got SAD because he

  knew his parents were probably worried

  SICK about him.

  And that made Roland MAD. So he pulled

  out his sword and took a step toward

  the One-Eyed Wizard. But now it was the

  One-Eyed Wizard’s turn to laugh. And

  even his LAUGH wasn’t as good as his

  brother’s.

  195

  The One-Eyed Wizard said the whole

  reason he picked Roland to BEGIN with

  was because he was too NICE to fight.

  And Roland knew the wizard was RIGHT.

  But now SANTA was mad and he WASN’T

  afraid to fight.

  196

  Santa rose up off his throne and used his

  staff to shoot snowballs at the One-Eyed

  Wizard. But the One-Eyed Wizard was

  READY for that and he blocked them with

  a magic SHIELD.

  Then the One-Eyed Wizard fired BACK by

  shooting FIREBALLS from his wand. But

  Santa BLOCKED the fireballs with icicles

  that fell from the ceiling.

  197

  Now the One-Eyed Wizard and Santa were

  face-to-face and they went at each other

  with everything they HAD. And Roland

  was worried because it seemed like Santa

  was LOSING.

  198

  But just when it seemed like the One-Eyed

  Wizard was going to WIN, an arrow came

  flying out of NOWHERE and knocked the

  wand from his hand.

  And Roland couldn’t believe his eyes

  when he saw who SHOT it.

  Shae’Vana shot three MORE arrows at the

  One-Eyed Wizard and pinned his robe to

  the ice wall so he couldn’t MOVE.

  Roland told Santa to look out because he

  thought Shae’Vana was going to shoot him

  NEXT. But Santa wasn’t scared at ALL. In

  fact he seemed pretty happy to SEE her.

  200

  Now Roland was more confused than

  EVER. But Santa and Shae’Vana explained

  what was going on. And this was kind of

  a long story TOO.

  Santa told Roland that Shae’Vana was